In this part of the world at least, the machinations of getting from A to B are never simple. It took 48 hours, two minibuses, a hundred mile edge of the seat ride in a Lada taxi with the bikes strapped to the roof, two trains, and a final 20km dash on the bikes to get here, all to be told we’d just missed the boat.

Such is life.

Here are a selection of photos and happenings from the marathon journey.

(I)
We left Bukara on Wednesday morning, catching a minibus to some nameless town whose name I never caught, and then transferring to another bus bound for Nukus.

The barren desert landscapes being served up only strengthened our belief that we’d been right to skip out this stretch of Uzbekistan.

In the second minibus, a modified Ford Transit, I spent 200km in a rearward-facing seat, looking back at this:

That jumble you see is three bikes tied precariously to the back seat with bungee cords and braced with my feet.

(II)
In Nukus we couldn’t find a minivan for the next stage of the journey, so we had to settle for a Lada taxi. How many bikes can you fit on a Lada? I heard a lot of Lada jokes when I was a kid, though this was not one of them.

Anyhow, here’s the answer:

I’ve never seen a driver so keen to get a fare. He was absolutely determined to pack us and our belongings into the little car, throwing our bikes around with reckless abandon and no regard for the damage being inflicted upon chains, dérailleurs and spokes.

The car was rust-speckled and of evident vintage. The front seatbelts were tired around the handbrake. Whether this was for neatness or to keep it in place, I couldn’t be sure. The speedometer didn’t work. Just as well, since the driver didn’t seem to give much regard to such trifling matters as speed limits. Perhaps to reassure Jared and myself or make us feel more at home, he spent much of the trip on the left side of the road, only swerving back to avoid oncoming traffic.

We coasted over potholed roads with a suspension seemingly made from used slinky springs. The uneven road surface, if nothing else, kept us a a semi-rational speed. I spent the entire journey with my eye glued to the road. I felt that at least one of the car’s occupants ought to be doing so, having lost confidence in the driver when he began counting the money Jared had given him while driving through the city.

(III)
Our train wasn’t due to depart from Kongrad until the following morning, so we had to camp outside the town. Finding a campsite is difficult enough in daylight, even more so in the dark, and we ended up next to a patch of mosquito-infested swampland. We threw our tents up in mere minutes, but it wasn’t enough to avoid being eaten alive by the little buggers. They even got into Katie’s and Jared’s tents. The next hour was interspersed with the sight of headlamp beams panning around tents and the occasional swatting sound that marked a successful kill.

(IV)

The train from Kungrad to Beinau was hot and crowded. We managed to grab some half-decent seats, and even snagged a bunk which we were able to use on a rotational basis.

Our bikes were crammed into a crawlspace between the carriages. I winced a little at the continued pummling being inflicted upon them over the course of the journey.

A constant stream of vendors roamed through the carriages, peddling their wares. There were so many hawkers, sellers, and money changers that it seemed as though only half the people on the train were actually passengers. Jared made a video of the action, which you can see elsewhere on the website soon.

(V)
We arrived in Beinau late Thursday evening, but had to wait several hours for the night train to Aktau. We grabbed a bite to eat in a nearby cafe, and settled . A dust storm was blowing through the town, and we sheltered from the billowing dust as best we could.

(VI)

After all that traveling, we finally made it to Aktau on Friday morning, over 48 hours after leaving Bukara. We were somewhat startled to learn that the train station was over 20km from the city and port.

The last 20km by bike was slowed by headwinds and, in my case, a not-so-slowly deflating tyre which needed to be pumped several times along the way. Some days you just ought to stay in bed.

We arrived at the port only to be told that there was a ferry, but that it was preparing to leave. Even if we had been in possession of our Azeri visas, which we weren’t, we wouldn’t have been allowed to enter. There simply wouldn’t have been time to grab tickets, clear customs, and roll up the gangway.

With no actual schedule of posted sailings, it was always going to be a stab in the dark. Still, knowing we’d missed the ferry by such a close margin was a little disheartening, especially after doing everything possible to get to Aktau in record time.

We are in our 9th hour of waiting for a ferry that apparently arrived today.

For a the full story read on…

I found out that the ferry had arrived after wandering in to the ticket agents office at 9am, whom BTW told us that they would ring as soon as the infamous Aktau to Baku had docked.

A few SMS texts later Tom and Katie were also at the agent ready top pay and get going just in case the ferry had already been loaded. We were initially told to be at the terminal at 2pm.

As we packed to leave a call came into the Keremet hotel stating that boarding time would now be 8pm.

Having been in Asia and the Stans now for just about 4 months we have learned that it’s better to be safe than sorry and went to the terminal at 1pm. It wasn’t more than 3 nights ago that our train scheduled for 1.20am showed up at 12.10am and within 10 minutes and people yelling at us to chuck our gear on and get in. The train then promptly left at 12.30am

So with a ferry that only comes every 3-7 days no chances would be taken.

The time however is now 9.30pm and there is not a person or official in sight that has a clue about when we will board the ferry.

The only upside to sitting in this nice air conditioned empty waiting room is the fact that they have unsecured and fast wi-fi.

Will we board the ferry tonight, who knows…….

Anna, Ruben, Leon, Peter and James. I hope your travels are going well and this information makes your stay here in Aktau a little less frustrating as you too will wait for the illusive ferry.

(if anyone has Peter’s email please send a link for this post to him)

Azerbaijan Consulate in Aktau, Kazakhstan

Aktau to Baku Ferry Ticket Information

Cheap Accommodation in Aktau

Other random Aktau notes:

There is an internet cafe on the 5th District side of the road (See the lonely planet map). It costs 350 Tenge an hour and is actually fast. They are open from 9-10pm every day. Tom found another one further from the city that is 24 hours and only costs 300 Tenge. Go all the way down the main road to the roundabout and take a right. It is located at the end of the block on the left side and is called Internet King. (11th District)

There is a decent supermarket opposite the WW11 memorial which is on the main street. It is called Ardager.

We have been unable to locate any bike shops as we are lacking in tube patches due to a spate of flat tires by all 3 of us.

As you know since then we have cycled through Kyrgyzstan and into Uzbekistan through some of the most amazing scenery and ancient cities that Central Asia has to offer.

Unfortunately the timing of entering Uzbekistan meant that we were in the country at the worst time in summer with temperatures soaring well over 40 degrees Celsius.

After cycling to the city of Bukhara through the hottest weather yet a “team meeting” was called and we discussed what we want from this section of our trip.

Despite the popular notion that the 3 of us are either masochistic or slightly insane a decision was made to use other means transport for the 600km of desert before the city of Nukus. Yes, we could cycle this by getting up at 4am every morning, sleeping during the afternoon and cycling at night, but it seemed illogical to waste our limited travel time and finances on more desert after doing just that in China.

From Nukus/Qongorit we took the train to Aktau as there are little to no roads or villages through and yes, it’s more extremely hot and boring desert.

Presently that puts us in Aktau, Kazakhstan where we are currently waiting for a ferry to Baku, Azerbaijan. From here we will be heading northwest to Georgia. There is currently talk of dropping down into Armenia for a few days before going back into Georgia to cross the border of Turkey. We plan to head through central turkey to the Mediterranean Sea and the city of Izmir.

For a visual view of since entering Central Asia check out this map.

As for Europe…stay tuned

Of course, you’re all dying to see photos of the ‘Stans, and you’d never let us live it down if we skipped an entire region just to save the awful torture of sitting on our collective arses in a succession of nice hostels while embassies and consulates push paper from one side of a desk to the other.

These forced breaks have been very beneficial – allowing each of us a decent chance to rest, recuperate and refuel. This may be more of a good thing than I’d care to admit. Jared ‘tactfully’ compared my post- food poisoning, post-China ribcage to that of a concentration camp escapee. He even beat me up a hill once last week.

In Almaty and Bishkek I’ve been wolfing down as much hearty food as possible to replenish my diminishing reserves. Mr Mitchell, by the way, is doing rather well with his personal weight-loss plan, dropping 8-10kg during our Chinese expedition. Katie, despite eating less than either of us, still frets that she might put on weight during this trip. It must be a girl thing: 7 or 8 hours on the bike is apparently counteracted by the very thought of food, which in itself creates “virtual calories” that weigh upon the mind of the female cyclist.

Anyhow, back to the point of the story. We’re looking forward to the day when we rock up to the Georgian border and get the first of many on-the-spot visas. After that glorious day, the trip will become a case of no more waiting, which may make us a little bit thinner, but also a lot happier .

There’s canned horsemeat or fresh ; smoked ham style; even the choice of some beautifully vacuum-wrapped horse penis should one want something a little more exotic. I’ve decided not to include a photo of the latter item as it might disturb some readers (i.e. our mothers), and because the shopworkers might have wondered what kind of perverts we were if we’d been wandering round the local Tesco-ski, gleefully snapping pics of chopped-off horse genitalia.

Instead, here’s a lovely pic of some garden-variety equine activity in Bishkek.

DISCLAIMER: No horses or hedge-rows were harmed during the writing of this article.

* P.S. don’t get me wrong: I’m not slagging the Kazakhs off for this. The French eat horse, and far weirder things; Koreans dine on dog; and the Chinese, as we’ve previously seen, think nothing of throwing whole rabbits and chickens – heads, feet and all – into their stews. Everyone has their own idea of culinary acceptability. It’s just unusual to me, and I like to write about the unusual.

Azerbaijan LOI (letter of invitation)
Uzbekistan LOI
Stan Tours Contact information

Originally our plan was to spend a whole month in Kazakhstan getting to know the culture while pedaling the entire length of the 9th biggest country, but as we have fast learned on this trip, routes through this part of the world need to be fluid and what you think you will be doing Monday night is not necessarily what will actually happen on Tuesday morning.

So with the route change that was mentioned in the previous post we had to scramble to get the official documentation together for more visas.

Enter David from Stan Tours

We found out about Stan Tours from the lonely planet, which by the way is not the best place for information on Almaty. As far as we could understand Stan Tours was a small home based tour company that specialized in this area of the world and posts online said that they would be able to help out.

With no address listed Katie contacted them by email with a bunch of options that we as a team had dreamed up, including skipping a bunch of the visa hassles by flying from Atryau to Tiblisi, Georgia.

We were greeted with a very fast and detailed reply of our options and the email also included routes that we had not even thought about and contact details for David, an efficient German who runs the company.

In Almaty we contacted David by phone and he offered free advice and options that would best suit our needs. We asked if we could meet with him and discuss the options more, to which he replied that he was very busy and unless we were actually going to use his service he would be unable to meet us. Time is money and I had already called him 3 times with follow-on questions.

As we had already decided to have Stan Tours sort out visa documents there was no problem meeting to make payment and get further detailed information. The only problem now was actually finding the place to meet him.

Unfortunately we caught the 63 bus and it went the opposite direction to where we were supposed to go, so we jumped out and hailed a taxi (a Mercedes pulled over) and got him to take us to Mega Center / Mega Almaty located near the intersection of “Al Farabi” just off “Rozybakieva.” If I were to go there for the first time again I would definitely just get a taxi (cost 500-700 denge) as it is not an easy place to find.

David had told us to meet him beside the fountain in-front of the Mega Center Shopping Mall. As we had no cell phone we arranged to meet him at 3pm but due to our incorrect bus excursion we were late and missed him.

Side note GET A CELL PHONE FOR THE STANS. They are cheap and one will work in most countries, plus they are not locked so you can buy SIM cards for them in all the other coutries.

While pleading with the malls security guards (very friendly lads) and explaining to them that we were lost tourists and needed to make a phone call (pay phones exist but its near on impossible to buy a card for them) a lovely lady by the name of Gulmar came over and started talking to us. This took us by surprise as from all our experiences so far (read previous posts) the people of Almaty were very cold and unwilling to help. It turned out she was from Aktau and worked for a construction company run by a British man. We told her that we were on our way to Aktau as we would be catching a ferry from Aktau to Azerbijian later in the month. She gave us her contact information and told us to call her when we get there as she would like to help us out. She also let us use her cellphone to call David and let him know that we had arrived and were waiting.

30 minutes later and we were sitting down with him discussing all possible routes to continue our trip. He was very friendly and helpful. We then paid him for the two LOI’s that we needed and said we would forward the rest of the information by email tomorrow.

Now we just have to play the waiting game for the visa letter of invitations to go through.

For detailed information of what is required for the visas we got and how to contact Stan Tours please read the pages below.

Azerbaijan LOI (letter of invitation)
Uzbekistan LOI
Stan Tours Contact information

I took an afternoon to wonder the lush tree laden streets of Almaty and walk through their numerous parks.

This is some of what I saw.

Yes, the city is very beautiful as it rises up toward the huge mountains that separate it from Kyrgyzstan, but in my opinion this has been dulled by the general cold/bitchy attitude of it’s inhabitants.

Women, while extremely hot, (x2) walk around on a Tuesday afternoon at a shopping mall dressed like they are ready to attend a presidential ball with a pouty, I’m more important than anyone else look. The men are not far off with their bling, fancy cars and aviator glasses.

I know this is the same in many other cities around the world, but I have never been to a place where the people are so unwilling to help a stranger out, especially one who is blatantly from out of town. This cold bitchiness has extended into most retail stores and shops that we have walked into as well.

Add this to the ridiculously overpriced accommodation, food, and Internet of Almaty and I would give it a rating of 2/10.

I would suggest going 60km East where there is a lovely little town called Esik nestled in the mountains. While I only cycled through there I’m sure that it would be a much nicer place to stay.

Of course we did have he odd kind person help us out, but in general the feel of this city is that if you don’t have money, or at least put on the appearance of having money you don’t belong. Keeping up with the Jones’s is alive and well in Almaty.

To these people of Almaty – Take a few pointers from your fellow countrymen/women. A smile and some form of manners goes a long way.

Also watch your pockets and bags. I caught a guy opening the back pocket of my bag while I was waiting at a kebab stall. I didn’t realize till I got home that he had stolen something out of it.

**This is the opinion of me and may not represent your experience.

It’s relatively straight forward really. Simply stand on the road with your arm out in a downward fashion 45-75 degrees to your side with your hand pointing to the ground, unlike how you would do it in America with your arm waving in the air.

Sounds simple enough right, but here’s the kicker. After talking to some of the Kazakhstan Peace Corps we met here they said that essentially, every car in the city is a taxi. While I have seen some more official looking cabs for the most part anyone can pull over and give you a ride.

We had this experience while trying to get to Mega Center on the SW side of the city. I put my arm out and a late model Mercedes-Benz pulled over. After haggling the price down we jumped in and away he went blaring his radio with dance music.

WARNING : Watch out for cars that pull over with two or more guys in them and basically use your common sense when deciding to get in a strangers car.

Our last luxury purchase was some cheap cellphones with pre-paid SIM cards, all the better to stay in touch with our nearest and dearest. There is a large electronics shopping mall called ZUM where I found a basic model Nokia for 6,000 Tenge (or approx 22 of your English pounds) Apparently these allow us to roam freely in the ‘Stans on the Beeline network, though I’m sure the calling rates increase exponentially each time we cross a border. To avoid this, and enable more continuous coverage when we hit Europe, we’ll probably be looking for new SIMS for each major country we cross into.

So after spending a couple of nights in a rundown hostel we decided to make the move to an apartment.

Paying for the apartment was extremely straight forward. All that was required from the small office that we used was one for of ID and payment. (in our case 4500 denge a night)

Picture of what the apt renting place looked like

After a little confusion with the directions to find the apartment as all the buildings look the same (Russian style apartment blocks) and some help from the locals we found ourselves opening the door to a very nice 2 room apartment located on the south side of the center of the city.

Our living room complete with Kazak TV

Quite a step up from camping in the middle of the desert or a hostel with a dirty shared toilet and a sink that is also to be used as a place to clean.

Sitting down to a home cooked dinner

After eating at restaurants practically every day for the last 2 and a half months it was a nice change to have spaghetti which Katie graciously volunteered to cook.

Lunch time. Note the extreme amounts of cheese

No time to get too comfy though. The road ahead is still a long one.

Turns out that they were heading to Almaty for flights home after spending 4 weeks traveling around Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan and Tajikistan.

We chatted to them for a while before parting ways and feeling a little sorry for them as they said they had to be back at work as soon as they arrived home.

Sounded like they had a great time.